Breaking fairy tale news has officially taken the phrase “when pigs fly” off the list of impossible things. The Three Little Pigs were spotted flying above the countryside late yesterday, carried not by wings, balloons, or questionable wizardry, but by their own hair. Witnesses report that the pigs had recently gotten their hooves on a mysterious hair…
Golden Goose Files Lawn-Suit Against Jack
In a surprising legal development this morning, the Golden Goose has filed what she is calling a lawn-suit against Jack, citing concerns over the living conditions of her soon-to-hatch golden eggs.
According to the filing, the Goose is “deeply appreciative” that Jack once rescued her from a giant and provided safety, security, and an impressive collection of throw pillows. However, she argues that pillows are not, and have never been, a substitute for grass.
Jack, for his part, maintains that the pillows are appropriate and has defended the setup by noting that they are filled with feathers.
“Feathers are natural,” Jack reportedly stated. “It’s basically a lawn, but softer.”
The Goose rejected this argument.
“Those are not my feathers,” she responded. “And they are certainly not a meadow.”
The dispute reportedly began after Jack completed construction of his new palace, where he relocated the Goose indoors “for convenience and aesthetic cohesion.” The Goose claims this decision reflects a troubling shift in Jack’s values.
“He no longer climbs beanstalks,” she testified. “He no longer farms. He stays inside. He scrolls. This is not the Jack I trusted with my eggs.”
While acknowledging Jack’s past heroics, the Goose insists that growth should not come at the expense of fresh air, dirt, and the occasional rose to sniff.
“My goslings need space,” she added. “They need sunlight. They need to smell the roses. Possibly eat them. We are still negotiating that part.”
Sources close to the case say Jack remains confident in the pillow arrangement and has proposed adding “more pillows” as a gesture of good faith.
The court has not yet ruled on whether Jack must return to the lawn, but a mediator has suggested a compromise involving outdoor beanstalk breaks and a designated egg-safe grass patch.
The Golden Goose says she remains hopeful.
“I don’t care about the gold,” she rhymed in. “My story must be told. Jack is over-valuing new trends and forgetting the old. Gold is cold. Grass we must hold.”
More updates as this lawn-suit develops.
I thoroughly enjoyed this new take on classic fairytales. My grand kids liked hearing the original tale followed by the newer generation twist. I followed this with questions to them to make them search deep down their own reasoning for the shift to the stories. Fun story lines with very creative colorful pictures. These stories engage little ones to really think and to dive into a very fun land of imagination.